I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
high people should be assigned attendants
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
