this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
