another moral hangover. fuck.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
