we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
My vagina is very pro this idea
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
