you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
