the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
