is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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