i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
