real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
