i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
