if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
