it wasn't lemon gatorade
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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