Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
