It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
