Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize