i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
