and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
