If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
