I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize