We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
