look no pants
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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