my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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