Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
