y did u give ur computer a hand job?
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
