I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize