No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
