they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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