if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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