I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
