she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
