my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
