we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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