thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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