either way he was missing a nipple.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
