The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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