when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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