Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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