Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
