am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Randomize
