our cab driver is having phone sex.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Randomize
