he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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