so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize