Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just invented taco cereal.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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