Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
