Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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