Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
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