Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
please come you make the beer taste better
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
