Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
im on a boat
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