she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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