btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
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